#WifelyWednesday: irritated?

Today marks the day I said yes to Daniel for marriage and you can read about our proposal story here.

It has been 3 years, and almost 3 years of being married means a lot of things. It means grace, mercy, forgiveness, imperfections, flaws, love, faithfulness, joy- I can think of more words that can describe it but in its totality, it’s all the work of the Lord in and through us.

On the first few months of being married, I received one of the best marriage advices and it came from one of my mentors Ms. Allen dela Cruz from my spiritual family Victory Malate. She said that I should be able to recognize a marriage problem from a marital irritation. A marriage problem is something that is more complex in terms of issue, while marital irritations are small things you can easily resolve or do something about (usually without sweat- I’ll explain this later). Example of marriage problem is lack of time together and/or failure to fill a need of the spouse. Marital irritations are-

You did not close the toothpaste.
You pressed the toothpaste tube near its opening instead of its tail end.
(What’s with the toothpaste?)
You left the door open.
You left the electric fan on.

As for me to Daniel,
You left the shower curtain open, now the bathroom floor is all wet.
And Daniel to me,
You did not put your used glass in the sink.

Mind you, for it to become an irritation, it has to be repeated over and over…and over and over again. It’s your spouse’s habit/s irritating you. When this happened to me, the funny thing is that I felt like I am back to living with a sibling, not a husband, who can irritate me with the slightest thing and feel like he’s picking on me, when in fact he is not.

So what’s the solution? Two things.

1. Ask properly.

I appreciate if you lift the toilet seat when you use it. (Keywords emphasized)

But even if your spouse doesn’t do it the next time, it’s okay. You can always do it yourself.

2. Just do it.
Lift the lid. Close the lid. Close the shower curtain. Wipe the floor. Turn on, turn off. Pick up socks. Hang wet towels. Throw dirty clothes in the hamper. I assure you, you can always do it in less than 30 seconds.

And that’s the no-sweat solution to marital irritations. Refuse to be irritated and become a blessing to your spouse the way God intended it to be!

Happy Wednesday!

{This is the first blog of a series I was supposed to start last year, introduced it to you here. Instead of “live wifely” though, I’m calling it #WifelyWednesday to share to you my learnings as a wife.} 😉

(Photo source)


4 thoughts on “#WifelyWednesday: irritated?

  1. Hello! I found your blog from the wordpress reader tagged “marriage”. I’m currently doing the Blogging 101 with wordpress and today’s assignment is to find 5 new bloggers and say hello! I’m new to the scene and looking for ways to make my blog better. I’m a wife and mom as well and I love connecting with wives as its a wonderful place to vent and give guidance to each other! I find it comforting that I’m never alone and that we all deal with the same issues in some shape or form! You’ve also inspired me to think of a way to share my wife lessons weekly. lol Thanks for sharing!

  2. Hi!! Nice of you to drop by, I’m glad you got inspired to write. It is my prayer to inspire & encourage wives & moms through this blog. I’m sure your hands & heart are full pf learnings so go ahead & write! God bless you 😉

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