To all the moms who understand real motherhood, the unedited and unfiltered type of mothering we fail to capture in photos, the daily grind, mundane & endless chores,
God never wanted us to perfect motherhood. He just wants us to fully depend on Him for new strength each morning, each time we wake up to face and do the things we are called to do.
Enormous and wonderful! THAT is the GRACE of God available for us when we have to breastfeed while cooking breakfast, eat dinner while nursing a crying baby, carry a toddler while washing the dishes, and I cannot tell you what I have done in the washroom while I carried my baby.
Real motherhood is not the glossy perfect uneventful posts you see in instagram (though I post some of my real motherhood moments).
Though I forget to wipe that yogurt that has dried up in Judah’s cheeks, and fail to wash his hands right before he thumbsucked, and happen to blink my eye when he put his slippers into his mouth, and a split-second late when he dipped his little fingers into the toilet bowl (true story), I will carry on. And even for the days I had no time to put powder on and looked like an oily frying pan with my moisturizer and the times I looked like I came straight from Walking Dead, pale, sleepless and hungry, I will keep on mothering. (Don’t get me wrong, I do make an effort to put lipstick and even blush on but there are really those days, and that is reality).
I will keep on mothering because it is not about perfection, but experiencing God in the recesses of my heart, Him changing me, the filth of my heart. When tested for patience, love and self-control, I can cling to the One Who has called me and cheers for me. I can fully anchor my being, my identity in Him even when I fail. And stand secure in times I cannot conceal my dark undereyes, He calls me beautiful.
Two days ago, I was cuddling with Judah in bed after reading his books to him and I felt his hand. So I held it tight and realized how much I love this boy, so I asked, “Judah, are you gonna hold mommy’s hand forever?” (With my tone coming from Princess Anna of Arendelle). He answered “no.” He doesn’t mean it but that’s one of the words he can say clearest for now and is fond of saying, no. Awhile ago, Alonzo burst into a loud cry at 6am just when I planned to sleep in because it’s mother’s day. After changing his diaper and trying to feed him, he still won’t stop crying. Oh well, maybe they still don’t know what mother’s day means.
Happy mother’s day morning!